


Fate is a Cruel Bitch

by Kaworu



Category: Stargate - All Series, Stargate Universe
Genre: Humour, M/M, Mpreg, Scary Dr.Lam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-18
Updated: 2012-09-18
Packaged: 2017-11-14 12:41:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/515341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaworu/pseuds/Kaworu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for SGU kink meme. Prompt: Scott/Rush mpreg.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fate is a Cruel Bitch

TJ frowned at the results. Of course it was possible that she's got it wrong, at least the first couple of times, but after all the tests... "Well," she dragged a hand through her hair looking at her patient nervously.

"What?!" Rush snapped. He was lying on the makeshift examination bed, propped on his elbows and glaring in frustration and growing worry.

"I'm sure you won't like it..." TJ contemplated softening the impact, but the pettier part of her cackled in evil glee and wanted to make Rush just _deal with it_ the way he made them all concerning anything about the ship. "You're pregnant," she said finally and watched in a mix of gloat and curiosity as Rush's expression change from blank confusion to disbelief to rage.

"It cannae be! I amn't a woman!" If the feverish glare, bordering on horrified, tension visible in every single muscle of the body, and raised voice weren't proof enough that Rush was rapidly slipping into hysterics, the slip into scotticisms was. "I'm wanting independent examination." He crossed arms on his chest in a show of defiance. "I doubt you've made a mistake," he said in a tone that was anything but actually doubting the said mistake. "I'm _sure_ you've made a mistake," he amended, calmer now, after TJ's confused look.

"Dr. Rush, you know I am the only medic on this ship." TJ tried to stay calm, she really did, but dealing with Rush wasn't easy on his best day, and now... Well, at least she couldn't really blame him --- the news _was_ a bit of a shock.

"Then ask for someone from the SGC!" Rush snapped. "You have the stones, so it should nae be a problem."

Still in shock then. Well, TJ was all too happy to leave him alone, at least until he calmed down enough to listen to reason.

~*~*~*~

Rush waited until the door hissed closed after TJ has left and flopped onto the bed punching it in the process and cursing. As absurd as TJ's 'diagnosis' was, he still couldn't disregard certain... events that might or might not have been connected to the case.

~*~*~*~

_Rush stormed into the room in time to see Scott jumping from the device with a guilty expression. "I asked not to run around the ship activating things before consulting me. I said there is not enough power, not to mention you can't know what there devices are supposed to do," he ranted. "But does anyone listen? No, of course you have to go and activate everything you can get your hands on."_

_"I didn't do anything!" Scott objected._

_"Of course you didn't!" Rush said sarcastically folding arms on his chest. "Then pray tell why is it on?"_

_"I don't know!" Scott answered defiantly, like a primary school boy to an angry teacher accusing him of breaking a window. That he didn't break. "I really don't know," he repeated at Rush's raised eyebrow. "I just... walked into the room and it turned on. Okay, okay! Maybe I touched it. But that's all, I swear!"_

_Rush still didn't look convinced. "Turn it off," was all he said._

_Scott fumbled with the device, but it continued humming merrily without any indication that it was going to stop working. Ever. "I... can't," Scott finally conceded, his head down._

_Something about the Lieutenant's stance reminded of a puppy about to be kicked, and Rush sighed. "Move aside," he commanded and strode to the device. "Let's see..." That was the last coherent, or at least not obscene, thing out of his mouth as the device let out some kind of beam at Rush. A moment later it was gone, and Scott hurried to the astrophysicist panting on the floor._

_"Are you all right?"_

_Scott had a moment to contemplate stupidity of the question and his own, apparently very limited, mental abilities as Rush glared at him managing to convey all that without a single word, then Rush stood up and looked at the device standing blank and innocent as if it has never activated._

_"At least now it's off," Scott said with a smile, also getting up, but the smile died a painful death at another one of Rush's venomous glares. "I guess I'll be going..." Scott was already halfway to the door in his hasty retreat when Rush wobbled and clutched his head. "Are you sure you're okay?" Scott asked. The answering glare lacked power which was answer enough. "Come on, let me get you to TJ."_

_"I'm fine!" Rush gritted out swatting at Scott's hands (who was genuinely trying to help, dammit! Why did Rush have to be so damn difficult all the time?)_

_"You are obviously not, Dr. Rush," Scott said aiming at calming tone and failing spectacularly. "Let me at least help you to your room." He grabbed Rush again, and this time the man flinched but let Scott escort him to his room._

~*~*~*~

Rush slid his eyes shut and cursed punching the bed again. TJ entered the next moment, perky and confident, and Rush growled mentally. "What, have you found the real cause of my nausea?" he snapped.

The medic didn't even blink at that, the charming smile never faltering.

"Who are you?" Rush asked after a moment.

"Carolyn Lam, SGC Chief Medical Officer," TJ's body chirped, and the fact that she seemed absolutely calm and _at ease_ in the situation made Rush a little scared for no apparent reason. "So, what do we have here?" Carolyn continued happily as she pushed Rush's shirt up without ceremony and started probing his lower abdomen. "What were the symptoms again?"

Rush gaped for a second. "Didn't TJ leave you a _note_ describing the case?" he finally managed cringing at the fail to make it more sarcastic. He blamed nausea and the doctor's attitude.

"Oh, she did," Carolyn beamed. "But I want to hear it from you, apparently you have doubt in your doctor's professionalism." The way her smile _didn't_ falter at that made Rush contemplate running for his life.

Instead he gave Carolyn the list of symptoms hoping she'll move her attention to something more important, for example, _proving TJ wrong_. No such luck.

"How frequent is vomiting?"

Rush cringed as a wave of nausea hit him at a mere mention. "About ten times a day," he gritted out.

Carolyn nodded making notes on a dirty piece of paper already covered by TJ's scrawl. "And the urination?"

Rush practically growled.

Half an hour and thousand embarrassing questions later (and not a single test, Rush noted with disdain) Carolyn patted a stack of paper newly formed on a table. "Now I'll have to fill you in on what's waiting for you in the upcoming months."

"Wait!" Rush snapped. "You- You haven't done any tests! How can you know for sure?" Yes, it was the last panicked attempt at denial, but at this point he didn't care.

"Doctor Johansen did all of the tests she could under the circumstances, and I can't find anything wrong with them. Any more questions?" Carolyn chirped happily. "Thought so," she continued without waiting for the answer. "Now, as I was saying... The nausea won't get better for at least a couple more weeks, same with everything else. If you'd been back on Earth, we would've tried therapy on you, but as it is... you'll have to deal with it. Then will come the backaches. Your spinal column is different from a woman's, so it is not supposed to support the added weight in the abdomen, and as a result... you'll have backaches from hell, and will probably have at least four weeks of bed rest in perinatal period, probably more. Then--"

"How could you possibly know that!?" Rush was near hysterical again.

"Do you think you are my first patient with this diagnosis?" And, yes, she was still smiling.

"Oh, I'll being the first _man_ with this diagnosis!" Rush nearly laughed, his expression bordering on crazy.

"I wouldn't be so sure," answered Carolyn offhandedly. "Now, as I was saying..."

Rush moaned miserably. Carolyn went on with her Horror Parade of the things Rush will have to deal with including the fact that there was no sufficient equipment to help him deliver on _Destiny_. "Oh, and by the way," she chirped in that infuriatingly perky way that made Rush want to crawl under the bed. "Abortion is out of the question, because there's no sufficient equipment for that either."

Rush who contemplated that thought from the moment the denial let out the last scream in agony... just sat. He didn't have enough energy for a reaction anymore.

~*~*~*~

Rush woke slowly aware of the presence in his room. Or rather someone muttering under their breath. "Please don't let it become a habit. Two times is not a habit, right? Please, God, I am too young for this..."

Rush opened his eyes and glared at Matthew Scott sitting on a chair near his bed and apparently praying. Or whining, it was hard to tell. Hitting him across the head would be so easy...

"Oh, you're awake." Scott finally lifted his head and looked Rush straight in the eyes. "Are you alright?"

Rush cringed.

_"Are you alright?"_

_Rush cringed. "Yes, I am perfectly fine," he forced out, the amount of sarcasm in his voice enough to melt Destiny's walls. The hands, strong and sure, helped him to the bed._

Then snorted deciding that the question didn't deserve any real answer.

"I- I know I might be the last person you want to see right now, but if I could help you? With anything?"

_"Please, let me help you." The hands --- why wasn't he aware of their warmth until that moment? --- were undressing him, helping him out of his jacket, tagging his shoes off, loosening his belt. The actions that were supposed to make him more comfortable, to let him sleep, were doing the exact opposite, every innocent touch shooting a bolt of electricity through his body._

"Would it matter if I said you couldn't?" Rush grumbled.

"No, not really." Scott smiled, that big earnest smile that made him look like an overgrown puppy.

Rush threw him a venomous glare that made the smile Die in Sufferings.

"So, um," Scott cleared his throat. "I guess we have to talk about... things." He brushed a hand over his shirt hair.

 _The hair too short under his hands, not enough to grab, not enough to hold on to. The body against his too muscular, too hard, too_ male _. Whiny growls in his ear--_

"You guess," Rush said in apparent distaste. "Well, you guess wrong. _We_ don't have to talk about anything."

_Hot muscle sliding on top of him, flat and hard, like a brick wall. Beads of sweat dropping onto his chest, mixing with his own. Hot ache where his body is penetrated, deep and angry and addictive--_

Rush shut his eyes and shook his head to get rid of the unwanted memories.

"But I want to take responsibility!" The earnest gaze made Rush wonder where the innocent imbeciles like the one sitting in front of him were manufactured. He'll have to nuke the place. "I know, I'll marry you."

 _That_ made Rush gape.

"I won't even have to leave the military for that," Scott continued happily, engrossed in his own little inner world. "Colonel Young said Stargate Command is used to looking the other way, and something about certain Generals being too valuable, and even if they weren't they can't do anything as long as we're up here--"

"Stop! I don't want to hear any more of this absurdity." Rush almost screamed then took a calming breath. "First of all, who said I would agree to marry you? Who said I wanted anything to do with you?"

"You might not now, but I'm patient. And persistent." Scott grinned, and Rush slumped in his bed with a miserable moan.

**Author's Note:**

> This fic now has a sequel. Check out Yoyi's When Fate likes to bitch around :D

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [When Fate likes to bitch around](https://archiveofourown.org/works/817382) by [Yoyi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yoyi/pseuds/Yoyi)




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